What the hell has been going on here?
One of the first things I did when I got back was, of course, check the bathroom walls for new e-mails and I want to thank you all for your continued correspondence and apologise to those of you whose messages got flushed (it seems the babysitter emptied the petty-cash, too, and certain daily necessities didn’t get replace and then Shame ordered in that vindaloo one night… if it was anything important and you haven’t already had a response from us, can I ask you to mail again? Thanks in advance). I was particularly delighted to see we had heard again from an old friend of the Photo Meme Hall of Shame and that his long list of recommendations had survived intact. We value our little helper’s assistance in tracking down infractions like an excitable little truffle pig and reporting them to us with conspicuous glee, but understand that to thank him publicly would be to rain untold horrors upon his dear little head. We were watching ‘V for Vendetta’ last night and inspiration struck; we’ve decided to give him and the rest of you who are fighting the good fight a code name: S for Shamer. Thank you, S, for your efforts. Justice shall be your reward, that and the knowledge that the more names you give us, the less likely we are to pay attention to your own meme entries.
So, I haven’t done this for a long time and it’s not easy to sit here on the mattress after that switching I got the other night on my arrival home (not that I’m complaining) but let’s see if I can pick out and pour scorn on a few of S’s suggestions. Photo Friday always provides us with plenty of shaming fodder and the recent theme of ‘thin’ had the little hamster in S’s head doing somersaults. Here are just a few of the motes in his eye:
415: Ladybug's Leaf
Hmmm. Yes. At first glance, this is a true-blue WTF meme entry but behold! The lily-pads are thin when viewed horizontally, the lily petals are kind of thin in a pointy, non-fat way and the water meniscus is so damn thin you can’t even see it with the naked eye. So, in summary, this whole composition is a big fat photo full of thin things. Nice try, S, but we gotta let this one go, although it is breaking our stony little hearts.
Thin...must be…the snowboard. I guess that’s it. Or maybe the guy’s hair under his woolly hat. Or maybe the tree branches. I don’t want to be too damning here because this guy is allowing voting at his site and this pic only gets 2.5 out of 5 so he’s probably feeling miserable enough about it. Everybody go and vote. Bump up the total so we can do a job on it.
404: Team Wet Dog
We heartily congratulate Teamwetdog (that’s what the smell was. Meme Shame has been a bit gassy of late due to his being on the Atkins Diet and I was blaming him. Sorry, sweetie) on their becoming ‘a little more adept at making something crappy and pixilated look a little less crappy and pixilated’. That’s never a bad thing. But ‘thin’? Nope. You’ve got the less crappy and pixilated down pat. Now try and work a bit on the ‘relevance’ side of things.
I’ve been gazing at this photo for the last 5 minutes trying to work out what exactly Orricle misread ‘thin’ as. I could only come up with ‘shin’ since there are one or two exposed in the foreground of the photo. Or perhaps it was ‘thing’, as in ‘post the first thing in the archives your mouse falls on but do it QUICK’.
387: Journey of the Mind
In Mr RQ Chen’s defence, I will have to confirm that of all modes of transport, bikes are up there amongst the thinnest, especially compared to, say, elephants and 747s. This one stands.
372: m a r p e s
As I’m always telling Shame, ‘Dressing in black, bending over backwards and moving in slow motion does not make you Keanu Reeves. It just makes me perkier when I call you Keanu now and again’. Likewise, labeling a photo ‘thin’ in Flickr does not magically render it a suitable meme entry. Yeah, yeah, broken glass, yeah.
As I type, the pings of new mail coming in from Shamers everywhere is deafening. I’ll deal with that later. Right now I need to go umpire the game of Twister Memeshame is playing with the kids. *sigh* He's cheating again.